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It’s raining hearts

April 13, 2010

It’s raining hearts (365/351), originally uploaded by JenniPenni.

You can stand under my umbrella…ella…ella…

I’ve been slacking on the writing front, I know.

It’s sort of a self-torturous choice, being a writer. I didn’t realize it until I started taking it seriously. Because it’s all in your head, you see. All your fantasies, dreams, hopes, fears, despairs, all the weird, incomprehensible, embarrassing details that you hope others would not notice, underneath all that pretty prose. You hope that through clarity, that the confusion of emotional turmoil brought on by the daily toil would shatter. You hope that through beauty, the essence of who you are would transcend the mundanity of living as it is. And everything is amplified, and everything vibrates, and everything means something and if you can’t see it you will delve into it and feel it with every inch of your skin from the inside out, and every letter carries. You hope that somehow, the best of you would be distilled, and transformed, and it rises, and the scent would linger, on someone, something, through some serendipitous fashion, and that would be all that matters.

Some days, that is all true.

Other days, I can barely hold up the umbrella.

Mortal obligations weight so.

I’m trying to get back to the former.

Meanwhile, I imagine that underneath that dark cloud, it’s raining hearts.

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6 Comments leave one →
  1. April 13, 2010 10:11 PM

    how cute!!!!

  2. April 14, 2010 1:11 AM

    And how long did it take you to write that? If you say “one try,” that thud you hear is my body hitting the ground, as I pass out due to disbelief. ;-)

    If I had a Twitter account, I would link to this post. It pretty much sums up what it’s like to be a writer, for those people who don’t know what we go through, or why. Since I don’t, I think I’ll just read it a few more times, so that I can feel the rain, and glimpse the rainbow.

  3. April 14, 2010 4:06 AM

    I’m always a little jealous of people who claim that writing always comes easy to them. On the other hand, if it were always easy, would it be half as interesting?
    And really, isn’t it only by sticking it out even when it’s not easy and fun and the words refuse to trickle, let alone flow, out of your fingers that you know writing’s right for you?

    Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go stare at a blank page some more.

    • April 14, 2010 11:12 AM

      Proving that you are a true writer, Gael. :-)

      • April 14, 2010 7:40 PM

        Though I should point out that writing quality, like a person’s worth, is not tied to the difficulty of its birth. There are great writers whose writings came easily to them (Trollope) and others whose writings were a daily struggle (Joyce). What is true is that the best writers know when to revise and rewrite a passage, and when to leave it alone.

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